Drawings from the 'Crowded House' show.

In other news, I'm so anxious I feel like vomiting and am fighting a sometimes crippling fear of failure.

I'm almost 26 years old! When am I going to start being a reliable, responsible human? I feel like I've been unsuccessful for so long that its never going to happen?

David Hanes said that Ryan Trecartin said that life is just about maintaining. I'd like to maintain a little bit better, thank you very much.

Also, sometimes its really hard to justify having a purpose, especially when you are like me and you can't entirely identify what that purpose is. Sometimes I know it so well, and other times I look around and wonder what the hell I'm doing, like, anywhere? Maybe this sounds kind of narcissistic or something but I always feel very on the outside of things. Like I'm kind of just observing life but not really participating in it. Even in groups of friends, relationships, my family. Its pretty rare that I ever get a sense of really 'belonging' or something and even still when I do it feels like I cheated, like I'm some sort of impostor.

Its not about being better or worse than anyone, either. And its not for lack of appreciating my friends or family or lovers I've had or anything like that. I kind of just feel a little lost and on the outside.

Is this a universal thing? Are we all a little like that Mersault dude from L'Etranger (plus or minus kind of being a sociopath)? What does it feel like to 'belong', to be part of something, or to really connect with another person? Is it just a moment or does it actually last longer than that?

Anyways, I don't really know, but I have to read some Clement Greenberg now so there's no more time for this kind of speculative dilly dallying. Also, on a more positive note, go see Shary Boyle's exhibit at the AGO. That lady blows my goddamn mind. She's the whole package.

bean in the straw

Drawing I did for FCWC 2. I forgot that I forgot to put this up. I also did some colour screenprints of this image. I'll scan those later.

I've been ignoring this blog all summer. School starts tomorrow. I just got a fucking twitter account. I guess there's a lot to talk about, but I'm not into doing it right now.

Still serious about it all but fighting major life doubts, as per usual. Do you get blue in the summer? August blues?

I needed to sit in front of a lake for like at least a week. Read more books. Draw because I love to not because its my job. Call mom more often. Eat more fruit and less burritos. Learn how to fix my bike. Play an instrument and sing because I think maybe I could still be good at those things. Be on time for work regularly. Be better with money. Go to bed at a reasonable hour. Hang out with my sisters like they are the best friends they are, not like family members. Keep bugging my brother to talk to me, even if he doesn't want to. Put boys as last priority. Stay on top of correspondence. Cook food at home. Go for runs. Keep a journal, instead of random scraps of paper.

I can still do all this, right?

CROWDED HOUSE on Friday August 20th

Hey cool friends

So here's a thing...
I co -curated a show that I also have work in!
Its at the Baitshop Gallery in Parkdale, in the Milky Way alley by Queen and Dufferin.

You should come!

Well and Good presents...

CROWDED HOUSE
Opening August 20th, 2010
7PM to 11PM
...Show Runs August 16th to August 29th

A collective group exhibition of Toronto and non Toronto - based artists and Illustrators, curated by artists Andrew McKay and Julia Dickens.


Not in the clamour of the crowded street,
Not in the shouts and plaudits of the throng,
But in ourselves, are triumph and defeat.
--HW Longfellow


When we first embarked on this project, we had decided to produce a
series of portraiture early on, all of us in some way dealing with the
human form, ranging from highly realistic to the surreal. As
we set to work, it admittedly wasn't until some time later that we
came to the conclusion that through working alone in our studios, we
were building a mass work that would integrate our individual
capacities into a new and complete whole.

Presented here is a collection of portraits from nine artists working
across Canada. The individual faces depicted in the works shown here
as a single collection, are a more or less accurate respresentation of
'the crowd.' As is the case with actual crowds this exhibition may
appear welcoming or hostile, a number of individuals together, or the
teeming throngs of the faceless. The crowd and it's representation
here may attract or repulse the viewer--perhaps both
silmultaneously--leading one to consider what is the individual's role
in, and response to finding one's self in the midst of other
individuals.

Essentially 'Crowded House' is a reapprisal of crowds and the
conception of such. The ways the mass exert force on the indivdual;
the nature of individuality and collectivity; and ultimately,
the ways in which the one exerts a force in directing the collective.

Thank you,

Julia Dickens & Andrew McKay


Works by the following artists:

Dietrich Rostek (Montreal/Ottawa)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/captainrosteck/

Kirsten McCrea (Montreal)
http://www.hellokirsten.com/

Andy Borehol (Kitchener/Ottawa)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/andy_borehol/
http://thedissatisfactory.blogspot.com/

Graham Robinson (Toronto/Ottawa)
www.beastwrong.blogspot.com

Ceilidh Stidwill (Toronto/Montreal)
http://ceilidhstidwill.blogspot.com/

Julia Dickens (Toronto/Ottawa)
http://juliadickens.blogspot.com/
http://fatcitywildcat.blogspot.com/
http://theotherwhitehouse.ca/

Vanessa Black (Vancouver/Ottawa)
http://vanessablack.wordpress.com/

Sherry Garcia (Ottawa)
http://www.myspace.com/sherrygarciaart

Theo Pelmus (Ottawa)

Opening show:
7 pm to 11 pm at the Baitshop Gallery

http://www.wellandgood.ca/
http://www.thebaitshop.ca/

(Photo cred on poster: Dimitri Karakostas)

SEE YOU THERE.

keen on zines

I finished my first ever solo zine today.

small regrets

Its a collection of short stories about things I regret doing, or not doing, in relationships.

I came up with it for the nano publishing class I am taking this summer, it started as a branch off brainstorming for another zine project I'm doing with my friend Dimitri Karakostas about how we can't find true love (but who can, really?). Look at Dimitri's things, the link above is to his personal blog, also he does a cool zine called Blood of the Young that is super neat and once featured me on it their site which sure is nice.

I am really attracted to things that are highly surreal and complex but also to very simple storytelling about mundane, or maybe more appropriately everyday events and thoughts. Small acts of bravery and sometimes failures, loss, love, questioning existance, fearing death, funny moments where someone says a clever thing or makes a good face and you spit out your lemonade cause its awesome, alienation and loneliness, momentary connections with other humans, overcoming obstacles large and small, friendship, being enemies with someone for silly reasons, nerd fury, tiny things that make people happy like magic cards or sitting under trees or riding a bus somewhere and listening to music and looking at all the fucking people out there and being terrified and stoked on life all at the same time?

The sublime in the mundane? Yeah, maybe, or maybe I just needed to get some shit off my chest, but here is a little something in that direction and maybe you'll read it someday and be like 'oh yeah, I know what that feels like' and we both will know that no one is ever really alone, right?

OH YA AND THIS

The Fat City Wildcat Zine Launch is TONIGHT

Presenting work from Toronto, South Africa, Germany, Denmark, and Scotland.


Featuring work by:

Vesna Asanovic
Gordon J.L. Auld
Andrew Remington Bailey
Nathan Bryant
Yigi Chang
Arend Currie
Taya Cornett
Julia Dickens
Sasha Foster
David F.M. Hanes
Reid James Jenkins
Jamie Johnson
Felix Kalmenson
Denelle Kennedy
Hugh Mater
Kristen McCrea
Andrew McKay
Jillian Kay Ross
Sabrina Scott
Katharina Szilágyi
Elliot Vredenburg



Writing by:

Brandon Kashani
Jeremy Lavoie

Performance by:

Yuppie Couples at 8:30!
(Swampy divine communications)

Music by:

Nathan Cyprys
Hubcap Orphans
Bravestation
Lowlands

Photo:

Spencer Leman

COME COME COME COME

If you are interested in getting a copy of my zine or the Fat City Wildcat please give me a shout at julia_dickens@hotmail.com. I'll post up information on where these things will be retailed shortly.

I love you, do something nice for someone today.

I feel kind of bashful about this...

But Taya interviewed me and its on the FAT CITY WILCAT blog.

Read it if you'd like! Also read everyone else's interviews. Actually, if you'd like to skip mine, I wouldn't mind! Really.

No, actually, thanks for posting these Taya, its all really rad.

MirrOrrM went super well. Its was great so see such a fantastic turnout, and everyone's work looked awesome. Can I just say how much I love the White House? I think joining was one of the best decisions I've made since I moved here. Maybe I already said this. Well, I'm saying it again!

There's no end to the work to be done, and unfortunately I have no (photos/scans) of new art at the moment, I'll probably get around to it next week. But lots of exciting things coming up this spring and summer!! So so many, actually,.

All I want to do is take a vacation. Oh, and lose like 10 pounds. Yeah, I know, how unfeminist of me, but like whatever, I want to fit into that nice dress again so maybe just shutup and come for a run with me?

xo

MirrOrriM

I drew up a poster for the upcoming White House show!

Vanessa Rieger (Vanessa where's your website??) is designing the colour part and Jesjit Gill is making the screen prints of it.

The 1rst exhibition at the new White House!

Featuring the work of:

Adam Cowan
Vanessa Rieger
Xenia Vakova
Julia Dickens
Xenia Benivolski
Christy Kunitzky
Jonathan Mayhew
Emily Cook
Krysta-Lee Karenina
Brandon A. Dalmer
Gregory Denton
Zoe Alexis-Abrams
Nadia Berlique
Rebecca Fin Simonetti
Hayden Menzies

Installation and performance TBA!

March 26, 8 PM -2 AM
277.5 Augusta in Kensignton Market

I can guarantee that if you don't come you'll spend a lot of time afterwards thinking about how you should have. So come!

xo

oh. hello.

WINNIE TRUONG

Look at her stuff. She had two huge drawings up in the big room on the second floor of OCAD and I was so so blown away by them. Also, she was in a poster show recently that a couple of other friends were in and she's in Free Drawings 7. I love her work so so so so much. Serious jealousy going on over here.

VIVIAN GIRLS

An Illustration I did for Pie Magazine, its an article that's basically a top 5 albums of the year type thing and Vivian Girls was at the top of the list so I drew them. I don't feel so great about this one, but its done so there you go. I haven't posted any new work in a while, and I figured it was time for an update.

Also, is Vivian Girls sold out? Its in, like, a week and I don't have a ticket and I'd kind of like to go?

That's it for now, more new work soon!